How do we really know what we are supposed to be doing? Does happiness come with it? Peace? Or just pushing through when we dont know how to feel? I don’t know….

Today I had lunch with two friends that happen to be in a book group together. One of them who had already read the book wanted to share some insights from this book. ‘Captivating’ by Stasi Eldrege. I had heard many things about this book and how wonderful it is, but I have to say I was not thinking the same thing. As my friend read this book to me, I kept wondering what fantasy world the writer lived in and how it must be nice to be so completly not living in this world.

I sat listening to the excerpts talking about seducing men and how singles are to prepare themselves and I quote “don’t give everything away, but don’t give nothing” (speaking about sex). I could not believe what I was hearing. This is a current bestseller in the Christian world and I kept thinking this is nothing but Christian romance/porn. It amazed me that this was even on the shelves, I can not fathom how this slipped by the population of American women as a good book.

I think this speaks to how much we are lacking in our lives and we look to a book to give us all the answers to why we are not treated liked princesses, and how to “work” the male gender into believing they are strong men, yet controlling them with the very thoughts that we were feeding them.

Let me say, I am not a man hater, in fact, i really like men. Someday I want to get married and get into fights and have sex and not have to worry about all the baggage that comes with sex outside of marriage. But this book makes me wonder if men are buying into this meek Christian woman idea. What is this becoming? I do not understand it at all.

I want to be who I am and not live in the pretend world of fairy tales and make-believe. I want to have a realtionship with a man that is based on a shared passion, but that passion is Jesus. I want a man that knows that God is to be the center and that romance is not everything.

I think this book sets people up for failures in relationships, then again maybe I am the one who is wrong here..after all I am single. Maybe Stasi has it right and we have to woo men into treating us with the respect we deserve, for me there will be no wooing. No dreaming and waiting for my prince to sweep me off my feet.

I am keeping my feet planted in the ground and when a relationship comes along I want to face it with strength, and knowing that it will be a fight to keep this above ground. I don’t want to be in a relationship by someone who is so moved by wooing and seduction that they can’t realize that relationships take an extreme amount of work and respect.

So if he is out there, I will find him when the time is right….if not well then he is not and I am going to be who I am regardless of what fate has for me in the future.